AUGUST 2008

Why must he tell me I look fine? I mean I know it’s not a negative comment, he clearly has the best intentions but come on, surely he can do better than “you look fine”.

It’s party night, I have a gorgeous new dress, had my nails done, freshly coloured hair and more clip in hair extensions than I care to mention, styled to perfection I might add! After the best part of the day has been devoted to getting ready for my fabulous evening, I reveal the finished result to the boyfriend. I’m looking for his jaw to drop or for his eyes to widen but I got nothing!

This does nothing for my confidence, which just moments ago as I stood in the mirror was pretty high. I am forced to prompt him, “how do I look?” I say, “fine” he says!! Come on, you look beautiful, incredible, sexy, even “you look nice” would do. Come on guys, shape up, stay sharp, and tell her just how good she looks!!!

Well its official, The X Factor is definitely back.  It’s been two weeks now but instead of the usual conversation about cringe worthy auditions or even potential winners; the main topic of conversation is Cheryl Cole and her amazing hair extensions!

Everyone’s talking about X factors sexy new judge. The sultry pop star that brings a youthful, trendy breath of fresh air to the show is shining on the panel each week. Of course this must be somewhat odd for the Girls Aloud singer as it was just a few years ago she found herself on the other side of the desk facing a panel of equally intimidating judges when she auditioned for Pop stars the rivals, the show which ultimately shot her and her fellow band mates to fame.

Producers have landed themselves a winner bagging Cheryl as a judge this year; I think they’ve topped bringing in Dannii Minogue last year. Cheryl Cole is absolutely gorgeous; she almost distracts the audience from the rest of the show. I can’t stop looking at her hair, it’s just fabulous, she’s immaculate with her luxurious hair extensions, I wonder if they are clip ins. Her colour is perfect for her skin tone and the styling each week is stunning, as of next week however I will try my best to get back into the spirit of the show and stop staring at Cheryl’s hair extensions!!

Using clip in hair extensions is like having an addiction. I’m telling you, once you start using them, it’s hard to stop! You’ll always want more, even if your hair is already long, you’ll still want it longer or thicker. It makes you want to upgrade and top up. Special occasions will come around and you’ll feel the need to celebrate and treat yourself to a new set. I don’t mind, it could be worse. My addiction isn’t bad for me and it doesn’t hurt anyone so I’ll continue to indulge in my guilt free, harmless, fabulous addiction. Who needs rehab?!

Today I have been watching the Olympics, just trying to get into the spirit of things, it is all very exciting, and I opted for the very obvious and girly first choice: the gymnastics. It’s just incredible to watch, the women’s gymnastics it was, they just defy gravity, and they do it with so much grace and poise.

However, although I watch in amazement at what is undoubtedly phenomenal talent, I can’t help but be disheartened, how can something so beautiful be plagued by something so hideous?! Scrunchies!!! They were everywhere; flying, leaping, spinning scrunchies! Colour co-ordinated scrunchies!  They’re such dainty, pretty little girls whose pretty little heads are outweighed and overpowered by giant ugly scrunchies. It’s bad enough their flippy floppy ponytails swinging about from a scrunchie but the worst is when they have those big buns with 2 or 3 scrunchies placed over the top, just framing the bun with a double scrunchie ensemble!!

It just won’t do. These are some of the most talented girls in the world, we shouldn’t have to see them in scrunchies, although I accept that a full head of beautiful hair extensions may not be the most practical choice when competing but surely that would be better than scrunchies?!

Now I’ve always been under the impression that Madonna epitomised sex, sure she’s not beautiful and/or flawless but she’s sexy right?  She’s always known what buttons to press; she’s one step ahead and certainly knows how to stir things up, reinventing herself time and time again, and looking remarkably in shape for such a mature woman, a woman of 50 no less!

When she came back in 2007 in that leotard, amazing I thought, until to my surprise, I find that the majority of men are repulsed by her!  What’s that about, I don’t understand, us women are still attracted to sexy men as they age, right, I mean come on, George Clooney, Brad Pitt, even Sean Connery, Harrison Ford, still hot! I know there are perhaps more beautiful older women in the public eye, the Demi Moore’s and Heather Lochlier but come on, why is Madonna so different. I know her leotards are revealing but it’s not like she has a wrinkly decrepit old body on show, she’s toned and in shape possessing a physic most women envy! So why aren’t the men attracted? Is it that a woman in her 30’s is sophisticated, in her 40’s is mature and experienced but in her 50’s is just old?! I refuse to believe this, because if that’s true then I’m halfway to being past it!

Maybe men are just intimidated by Madonna, she is probably one of the most powerful women in the world who’s clearly very strong and secure in her sexuality, is this a turn off?  Despite what the men think, I think Madonna looks remarkable and I’m sure she’ll keep going and continue to shock and impress, I mean right now she’s looking incredible, I’m loving her hair, the colour is a perfectly delicate and feminine shade of blonde that works great with the defined waves from root to tip, I am curious as to how she achieves such a colour on her naturally dark hair, perhaps it’s easier with a few grey hairs or could it be a lace front wig or hair extensions? Either way, I’m impressed, Madonna! Looking good!

Why is it that my hair requires the same care as a mogwai?! Can’t get it wet, expose it to direct sunlight or feed it after midnight!  If one does break these rules then a spree of vicious creatures will spawn and terrorise the city! Well not quite but there will be consequences that’s for sure. I can’t decide what’s worse, the rain or the wind? See when it rains, I just look like a drowned rat, a rat with great long hair yes but a rat nonetheless but when it’s blowing a gale, disaster, wefts are on show!!! This just wont do, but I got to thinking, if I did own a mogwai, I would have to take care to follow these simple rules right? So I’ll do the same with my hair, just take care and always be prepared. In the event of heavy rain, I’ll scrunch and call it tousled chic and as for those pesky gales, I’ll tie it back and back comb my ponytail for that “I just threw it up” look! I will make it my responsibility as the owner of such a volatile mane to always look my best come rain or shine!